Irish luck

An Irishman fell a hundred feet from a building site and asked if he was hurt by the fall. "Indeed not," he replied, "It wasn't the fall that hurt me at all, it was the sudden stop."

Two Irishmen had filled a cart with hay and were driving it out of the field onto a narrow road and into the path of an oncoming car. The car driver jammed on his brakes just in time and swerved into the field they had just left. "Thank the Lord," said one Irishman to the other. "We only just got out of that field in time."