Bubba

Twenty-eight years ago, the Army drafted Bubba, a redneck from deep in the piney woods of East Texas.

On his first day of boot camp, the Army issued him a toothbrush. That afternoon, an Army dentist yanked several of his teeth.

On his second day, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon, an Army barber sheared his head.

On his third day, he was issued a jock strap.

The Army is still looking for Bubba....